Majority of us like to be liked. It feels great to be a nice person and to do our best to help other people out where we can. But is it possible to care too much? To care so much about other people that they walk all over us?
While I am very much in favor of ‘To be happy, make others happy’, sometimes, it has to be the other way round.
It’s one thing to make others happy by making little sacrifices. That’s perfectly fine. But to make someone the centre of your life and push away everything else that mattered to you is perfectly NoT fine. Why? Because it will eventually make you unhappy. Because you will eventually lose the point of life. And the person you did it for, will not even appreciate it. And when they fail to appreciate your efforts, they take you for granted.
So, how do you manage empathy and selfishness? Because no matter what one would like to believe, selfishness is a virtue. Well, sometimes. Loving someone with all your heart is great, but being submissive all the time isn’t. Don’t be their doormat. Let them love you too.
Here’s something I have learnt over the years.
- Grow a back bone.
- Grow a back bone
- Grow a back bone (Because “growing” a backbone takes time, courage and effort and a LOT of self control.
- Get back to your hobbies and the things you stopped doing.
- Make friends.
- Do something meaningful.
- Smile more frequently.
- Get a life. Rebuild it.